A refreshingly calm and well organised annual hip appointment took place this week. My surgeon kindly allowed me to describe my various symptoms but assured me that the x-rays show no change and, more importantly, the hips look stable.
What had preceded this was the usual months of anticipation because of changes and worsening of symptoms and general trepidation of what this might mean. I am always aware of the age of my hips, rightie is 20.5 yrs old and leftie the 3rd (a revision hip replacement) is 5. In my mind, I’m very conscious that these hips will be loosening and wearing out. I realise now that I’ve been viewing these as ticking bombs almost.
The consultant believes my symptoms are due to problems with muscles and tendons. This is hardly surprising given how much my hips have been through, combined with changes in hormones of a woman in her 40s. It all plays a part.
This is good news in that my replacements are solid but physio awaits. Never good in my book! Hopefully I can get things back on track without invasive interventions in the future.
The difference since this appointment is huge. I have continued to have the pains in my thigh and side of hip, I’m stiff on moving and tiring easily. However, knowing the hips are not loose has changed how I feel about it. I’m not panicking. I’m not catastrophising, as a psychologist would describe my previous responses.
I’ve always maintained that understanding what is happening, having explanations, helps me to manage the symptoms better. I feel this is proving it.
At the same time, I am reminded of a physio I saw aged 23, after the first replacements were done. She told me I hadn’t fully accepted into myself my hips. I have always been able to understand her reason for saying it but I think the phrasing was so off putting I dismissed the meaning more than I should. But I’ve always remembered it and there have been times it has come to mind. This week is one of those. Perhaps if I embraced my new hips more and trusted them, instead of fearing what might go wrong or when they will need revising, I might not be so inclined to catastrophise.
It’s only taken 20+ yrs to realise this…
My Chronic Pain 